You ever have one of those weeks that just dragged on and on and on with no hope of ending, or accomplishing the thousands of tasks at hand? It happens to us all. The best medicine doesn’t cost a thing. Find a friend or loved one to spend some time with and tell funny stories, people watch, make fun of each other, and just plain ol’ belly laugh. You know the type – – when you laugh so hard your eyes water, your cheeks hurt, and your tummy starts to spasm from overuse. After a couple hours of engaging in great conversation, and letting yourself forget about all the things you have no control over in this moment seem to melt away, effortlessly. Thanks friend for the great laughs tonight! I needed it!
The pathway to love seemed so hard when I was single, and to be honest…even when I first met my husband. Keeping the love you have requires just as much work, if not more than the hunt. The difference is your investment and your perspective on how this person fits into your life long-term.
Relationships are like plants. They are all a little different, and require a specific type of care, but the basic principles are the same. You water it, fertilize it, give it the right amount of sun and attention, and it grows stronger each day.
For some the difficult task may seem to be finding your partner in life, your person, or as I like to call them – your lobster. The reality is that its harder to keep the love you have, than find it. Some may believe once I have netted that delectable lobster, I am all set and get to enjoy the fruits of my sea voyage. The truth is, your real journey begins. It takes work to meld two lives together. Two hearts, two minds, two belief systems, two sets of values, financial understandings, parenting beliefs, behaviors, etc. It only took your whole life to become who you are, is it realistic to think you can change another person overnight to do everything you want – or think is “right”? Of course not! A marriage/relationship is about coming together with a common set of beliefs and making it work for both people, then creating a new reality that honors the life you want to live – together.
Over the past few years in my marriage I have learned Five Principles that have helped us build a happy life together.
I wish things had been different. I wish I had known you before you disappeared, before things got crazy. My memories are sketchy, so I don’t recall much. There was a picture of me and my sister with you at the beach. We looked like we had so much fun. Others with you and that big smile, those kind eyes, the long hippy hair. Mom said she loved you once. There are the stories from the Aunts that loved you and said you were so cool.
I was 2 years old when Continue reading
This is a great activity I learned from one of my amazing professors at University of South Florida, Dr. Ryan Henry. You can use it with a client or even with yourselves to better understand Continue reading
Have you ever wondered why it is there is that one thing- a habit, a behavior, a prevalent thought, a vice… that no matter how hard it seems you try, you cannot conquer? What is the lie you tell yourself that continues this? I heard an interesting sermon this morning that relates to this topic, and whether you are believers or non believers, the message is powerful. The question asked is what was the event, and what is the lie you tell yourself now? The Pastor’s example was that as a child his parents got divorced and his grandmother would babysit them, and she often soothed him and his siblings with food. He recalled her crying as they ate, yet reassuring them that everything would be okay. He was overweight as a 10 year old, and the lie he told himself is that he would always be fat.
This message of how we speak things into being in our lives, has been delivered in many different forums. I have even addressed this in previous blogs. So, how do we take steps to change this, to conquer our demon?
We Discover Truth. Meditate, pray, listen to the voice within to help you find that truth. Then, live in that truth. If the message says you will always be fat, your truth is that you will honor and protect the health of your body. If you have an addiction, the message AA/NA groups implore you to remember is that you have to give it over to your higher power (whatever a higher power means to you), give up the illusion of control, and live each day one day at a time – without the source of your addiction. If the lie is that you are a bad person, your truth is that no person is bad, there are just bad choices, and from a bad choice a lesson can be learned to start anew. Bottom line, find the truth that resonates for you and boldly decide to honor that truth!
Please comment and share your truth, so others can learn from your journey.
No matter what we do, what we don’t do, what we see, hear, believe or want – one thing remains unchanged about life. Time passes and we get older. We can age gracefully or we can wither away. This year as I reflect on another 29th birthday — hey no judgement! 29 was a good year, so I plan to remain 29! I think about what I have accomplished thus far and what my dreams are for the future. Taking some time each year to reflect on outcomes (goals), accomplishments, and new challenges to embark upon, offers an opportunity to evaluate the commitments you have made to yourself and others and evaluate the results. If the results are not what you had planned or hoped for, chart a new course and continue or develop a new outcome plan. Continue reading
One of the most important and most difficult decisions we face in life is determining the vocation best suited for us. Many factors come into play such as: what are my interests, abilities and aptitudes; what jobs are available in the current labor market; what type of training and education are needed for a specific position and how will I afford the necessary training for my field of interest? Continue reading